Tuesday Post

Taggert: Well if that don’t beat all. Here we take the good time and trouble to make it all the way to the super regionals at home again. And for what? So we can lose to the Northern Cuba Pelicans. I am depressed.
Lyle: Gee Mr. Taggert, I shore hate to see you like this. Say, would it make you feel any better if me and the boys were to shoot them Pelicans?
Taggert: You know, it just might.

For those of you who are uneducated in the ways of great comedic performances, that was a little bit of tweaking with a scene from Blazing Saddles, which is definitely in the Top 5 comedies of all times. So what the hell am I talking about? Well OUR Ole Miss Rebels lost to the Northern Cuba Pelicans (or as you might call them, the Miami Hurricanes) in the Super Regionals. Just like last year, we won the first game in Oxford, but lost the final two. Last year we lost to Texas who eventually won it all. This year we lost to Miami. Every time I turned on the games, those Cubans (I mean Hurricanes) were bunting. What a bunch of ussypas! Sorry but that just pisses me off. Swing the bat like a man!

So last night I was going to go to the gym after work, but the Rebs were playing. So I picked up a dozen wings from Buffalo Wild Wings and headed home to have a few beers and wings. I had the Spicy Garlic ones. They weren’t hot enough. Towards the end of the game, I raced back to get some more. This time I got the Caribbean Jerk on 6 wings. They were a little hotter, but not that much better. So I watched the Rebels. When I got bored. I watched Entourage, Deadwood, and the Sopranos. I flipped back and forth. That’s the only good thing about cable. You have that On Demand crap. But I still hate cable. DirecTv is much better.

So I’m just a little upset over the Rebel’s loss. Add to that the fact that US lost in World Cup play to the Czech Republic. I’ve wondered how the hell we could lose to them, but I guess if you had to practice on fields with landmines you’d be good too. Seriously though, didn’t they just spend the last, oh, 100 years in war? When did they have time to become that badass at soccer (futbol)?

So what’s on the calendar this week? Nada. Absolutely nada. I’m kinda digging it too. I know this weekend is Bonnaroo. I went a few years ago and had a blast. Now I’d be too grumpy and need a shower by Saturday morning. That and I’d bring plenty more supplies and an air conditioned RV. Charly, I hope you’re taking hints here. Oh yeah, don’t get a ridiculous sunburn the first day because you have to wear a shirt the rest of the time. But that’s one of the good things about hippies, even I could walk around topless. Hell yeah! Reminds me there was this hot chick in a bikini bottom and a spray painted top walking around. So basically she was nude and painted. I had been walking around with a camel back full of margaritas all damn day and decided I needed to get my pic with her. I need to find a digital version of that so I can post it. I look like crap, but she was hot.

What else is going on? Oh yeah! Sunday is Father’s Day! Get Dad something nice because he puts up with you, you insignificant bastard. Hopefully we’ll go to the lake. But you never know. I would like another stress free weekend. That would be awesome.

Oh yeah, if you men haven’t already figured it out, we have officially been in “Gold Bond Season” for the last month or so. So powder up the boys. There’s nothing worse than peeling them off your legs. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, then stay naïve. It’s cute and you’ll never get laid. So enjoy that.

Ok, I’m gonna roll. You kids behave yourself but keep it sleazy.

Songs on the Playlist:
Aerosmith – Love In An Elevator
Mr. Mister – Broken Wings
Shooter Jennings – Daddy’s Farm
Nirvana – Plateau
Robert Earl Keen – Down That Dusty Trail
James Brown – I Feel Good
Traffic – Empty Pages
George Strait – All My Exes Live In Texas
Paul Simon – Graceland
Pat Green – Dancehall Dreamer
Kylie Minogue – Outta My Head (she is so hot in that video)
Jack Johnson – Situations
Drivin N' Cryin - Straight To Hell


charly said...

Dude, that's half the fun of Bonnaroo - bein' dirty and hungry as shit. Then on Sunday night or Monday mornin', you arrive at the Waffle House and eat to your heart's content.

By the way, I prefer not to shower at Bonnaroo, thankyouverymuch. I mean, you're gonna be surrounded by dirty hippies all day long, so if you're clean, that means you end up smellin' everyone around you. If you're not clean, you don't smell anything, 'cause you probably smell just like them. :)

MG said...

ok, now you got me singing....


oh well.

Gold Bond huh?
your blog's so educational

Philip said...

To my knowledge only men use Gold Bond. I don't know what kind of effect it could have of your nether regions (sp?).

Maritza said...

Until you mention "Broken Wings", you had me going. That's a joke, right? I'll even ignore the comments about Cubans (since I am one)!

First time reader, first time commentor and first time I've ever heard of someone's love of Gold Bond besides mine.

Philip said...

Maritza - No it's not a joke actually. I have a HUGE library and make random playlists. That's how I get great songs next to crappy ones. I had a Michael Jackson one earlier. I didn't even know I had any MJ on this computer.

Wassamatta? Can't take a joke when I'm a sore loser? But seriously is that a Cuban thing to bunt every inning? That got real old real fast.

And do women actually use Gold Bond too?

Thanks for stopping by

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

Mmmmmm...wings and beer...now I want 'em for breakfast! ;)

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