Lance Bass Is Gay / Michael Jackson Rant

After lunch, I was scanning the net when I found this story: Lance Bass is gay. Not that any hetero man from my generation (i.e. in college when those douches in N’Sync started) ever doubted it. But my sister grew up listening to them. They were her first BIG favorite band. I showed her the article, and it has ruined her day. She left my office and came by a few minutes later to tell me that. I told her it wasn’t that big of a deal. She argued that it was because she grew up listening to these guys. I had to put things in perspective for her:
“Look, he’s only gay. At least he’s not a child molester like Michael Jackson (supposedly). How do you think that effected my generation?”
But that got me thinking: why weren’t we that shocked when he was charged with child molestation time and time again? I don’t think we were. I think we were slowly shown the insanity of Michael Jackson over years and years. He went from taking Brook Shields as his date to the Grammy’s one year to taking a friggin monkey some years later. What’s up with that? I’m not even going into the skin bleaching thing. Or the millions of plastic surgeries, which reminds me, does anyone else think that Lil’ Kim is looking more and more like Latoya Jackson every time she gets a new plastic surgery?
If you’ve ever seen Eddie Murphy Raw (I think it was Raw), I think he does a bit about Mr. T and Michael Jackson. He talks about how he did some jokes about both and found out they were both looking for him. He was afraid of Mr. T, but he wasn’t afraid of Michael Jackson. He took the joke and said “you know, we don’t know too much about Michael Jackson. You know, he’s a recluse; he could be a bad mother f*cker behind closed doors.” I guess history has proven that Eddie was on the right track but he made the wrong conclusion. He isn’t a bad m-f’er behind closed doors. He’s a nutcase who needs to be put in a rubber room and looked at through a small window for the rest of his life. But that’s just my opinion.

I have one final question for you, dear reader: why the hell do we actually care about these washed up, no talent, ass-clowns?